Only in the DMV--Letters to the Editor edition.

When I think about what the political class in Washington DC sounds like, I always think of Washington Post columnist George Will.

Will isn't afraid to use SAT words.  Truth be told, he's already moved on.  He's in GRE territory.  

And, he loves to use obscure historical references.  Usually to a war I've never heard about, or a group that sort of, kind of sounds familiar.    

You know, just to remind you that that all that daydreaming in History has come back to haunt you.  

But, it turns out George Will has some competition.  In the Washington Post's Saturday letters to the editor one Dennis William Chapman wrote in to complain about the previous week's real estate section story on micro houses.  

I'm not a fan of micro-houses anymore than I am a fan of micro-units.  They may be affordable (in a comparative sense), but I reject the idea that affordability basically amounts to high-end SROs (single room occupancy).  I don't care if that tiny counter-top is marble and the space is ergonomic.  If I don't have room to chop veggies, or at least 500 square feet to wander around in, it isn't big enough.    

But, Dennis puts it so much better than I could.  He manages to combine erudition with DC bravadoI will crush you peon.  Here he is in all of his glory:  

"The Post should not promote this artistic debauchery.  The 'green' Philistines mean well, but they must be controlled.  People need art, beauty and a little more room."  

Well done Mr. Chapman.  And Mr. Will, you might want to watch your back!  

Olympian Delusions--DC Style

My new favorite phrase is 'you can't make this sh*t up.'

Why?  Because it always seems to be true. You'd think I wouldn't be surprised by now.  But I am, over and over again.  Some part of me clearly wants to believe people are rational.  But, in reality, few of us are.  Especially the rich.  They aren't just irrational, they are exuberantly irrational.    

Case in point, the local millionaires trying to bring the 2024 summer olympics to DC. 

The Washington Post just uploaded a glowing profile of the movers and shakers behind this deal. See my earlier blog post about them here. 

I won't bore you with fawning portraits painted of the individuals behind the group.  Suffice it to say here that two things caught my eye, and both of them demonstrate the folly of the rich.

1.  The Washington 2024 crowd wants Olympic facilities to be built on city land!  That's right, let's use city land to build stuff for other people, because clearly DC doesn't have any pressing things to spend money on.  I mean, yes, there is that old hospital housing hundreds of homeless families, but move along now, nothing to see here.  Yes, it is true, we need to build some affordable housing, but isn't that what PG County is for? 

2.  The Olympics would be good for DC's reputation on the world stage.  House of Cards make us look bad, they say.  Especially to the Chinese.  And, we simply can't have that.  Whip up some distractions ya'll!   

May I suggest instead that there's an easier way to fix this.  Pull out your capes delusional Olympians, get your wigs brushed out, call in your back up singers, and put Gloria Gaynor's 'I'm coming out' on the sound system.  Then have yourselves a big ole drag party.  You'd do all of us less harm that way.  

Fighting for Millennials--City/Suburb edition

City and Suburb have history.  There are slights, fights, outright insults, and more than a fair share of cold shoulders.  So, it probably shouldn't surprise us that they'd fight over millennials as well.

Until recently, however, everyone thought the city had won that battle (many times over).  We're constantly bombarded with stories about millennials' preference for urban hotspots.   

Well, it turns out (according to a recent Washington Post article) that a lot of millennials can't actually afford to live in the city, or can only afford to do so if they shack up dorm style in 1 and 2-bedroom apartments.  And, let's not even discuss group housesmillennial warehouses. Turns out millennials at the upper end of the age bracket are also having trouble 'upsizing' inside the city when they get in a family way.  Two bedroom apartments are in short supply and even more ridiculously expensive than the city's already ridiculously expensive 1-bedrooms.   

What does all of this mean?  Well, we know that millennials are moving into the city at higher rates than any other age group.  But, it turns out they are also the largest age group moving out. 

Who could have seen this coming?  Everyone, it seems, but the stewards of Mayor Gray's 'One City,' who've been busy celebrating the luxurification of the District of Colombia.  It was, after all, Gray's former Director of Planning, Harriett Tregoning who called 14th Street's transformationinto the Champs Elysees"fascinating, anomalous and wonderful for the city!"

But, never fear millennials, neighboring Prince George's County has your back!  After the Washington Post published its article, Eric Olson, a county council member in Prince George's County came a' courtin'!  Turns out PG County has bike trails, some walkable neighborhoods, access to public transportation, and most of all affordable rent. 

I don't have a dog in this fight (I live in MOCO), but I'd hate to see the battle for millennials reduced to a battle over which is better--city or suburb.  The real problem is that the DMV is an expensive place to live, and the closer you get to downtown DC, the more expensive it becomes (with some notable exceptions).  There's also a dearth of affordable housing in the city, and many of its close-in suburbs.  Until that problem gets addressed, the real segregation lines will continue to be economic (and social), not generational.